When Yoshinon spotted us, Yoshino spun around and landed on the ground.
“Ohhh~ So it was Lucky Pervert Guy~ And Knight Guy’s here too~?”
“Uh—”
[—Shido, wait.]
Just as Itsuka-kun was about to speak, a set of choices popped up. I’d heard before that the AI inside [Fraxinus] would judge the situation on its own and provide three options, forcing the user to say whichever one they picked. Honestly, if the crew were the standard for "normal," it was kind of scary. None of them seemed sane.
[Shido, go with number 3.]
“Ugh. I really have to do that...?”
[Of course. You’ve got a perfect model right there, don’t you?]
“You mean Tonomachi...?”
I decided to pray for Itsuka-kun’s soul. Having to utter a line like that with his own mouth? That was definitely the kind of thing that would make people socially distance themselves from you.
“Hmph! No idea what you mean. I’m just a wandering traveler passing by~!”
“Pffft!”
I did my absolute best to hold back my laughter. If I laughed now, Itsuka-kun would definitely suffer. But honestly, it was way too funny...
“Kya-ha-ha! Mister, are you a comedian~? That’s not really in style these days~!”
Seeing Yoshinon’s reaction, Itsuka-kun made a sour face and introduced himself.
“Ahaha... My name is Itsuka Shido. And you are?”
“Oh! Mistake! Yoshinon forgot to introduce herself! Yoshinon’s name is Yoshinon! Cute, right~? Cute, right~?”
“Uh, yeah, cute, but... that’s the in—”
When Itsuka-kun tried to say the word “doll,” I hurriedly covered his mouth. He looked at me as if asking what the hell I was doing.
“Itsuka-kun. Just in case, please don’t use the word ‘doll.’ Right now it may look like a child doing ventriloquism, but that is not what this is.”
At my whisper, Itsuka-kun nodded. I’d wondered at first if it really was ventriloquism, but it didn’t feel like that at all. It was more of... a sensation. My instincts were telling me that thing wasn’t just a doll.
“What’s with you two~? Why are you acting so weird~?”
“Nothing. I was just telling Yoshinon not to be so cute that you fall for her.”
“Kya-ha-ha! Knight Guy sure knows how to talk~ If you’re thinking of trying to seduce Yoshinon, you’d better give up~!”
“Haha, how could I possibly seduce Yoshinon? You shouldn’t even look at trees you can’t climb in the first place.”
My answer must have amused her, because Yoshinon kept laughing nonstop. Then, the commander shouted through the intercom.
[Hey! What do I have to do to raise her affection?!]
“What?”
[The spirit’s affection is rising right now! And fast! At this rate, she’ll end up liking you instead of Shido!]
I had nothing to say to that. No, seriously, what had I even done to make her affection go up?
“So~ what are you two doing here~?”
At Yoshinon’s words, I decided to push Shido and her toward a date first.
“Itsuka-kun.”
“Ah, um... this is sudden, but would you go on a date with me?”
*****
Luckily, Itsuka-kun accepted the date request. Now, I was watching the two of them on their date from the department store.
“Wahahaha!!!! How is it, Shido-kun! Cool, right? Yoshinon’s cool, right~?”
“Hey, that’s dangerous!”
Right now, Yoshino was standing on top of the jungle gym. Looking at her, it felt like Yoshinon was the one controlling her body. It was a little creepy. Was this some kind of split personality thing?
“I asked if I was cool, not whether I was dangerous.”
Yoshino, balancing precariously on the top, looked like she was about to fall, so I hurried over and caught her.
“Honestly. I knew this would happen. Just like Itsuka-kun said, that’s dangerous.”
“S-sorry~ sorry~ Knight Guy. I was careless~”
[Shido! Hiki! Emergency!]
“What?”
“What?”
No, what the hell is “Hiki” supposed to mean now...?
“Guh! This pressure is...!”
“Tohka...?”
Before I knew it, Tohka had arrived at the department store, and an enormous aura was pouring off her body. That was definitely anger.
“Shido, what are you doing right now?”
“What do you mean, what am I doing...”
“After making me worry like that, you were fooling around with another girl...! What is the meaning of this!!!”
KWA-KA-KA-KA-BOOM!
When Tohka stomped her foot, the ground split open right there. No, wait, wasn’t she supposed to be an ordinary human?! Weren’t you saying she was in the same state as a normal person?!
[Oh no. Her mental state has become pretty unstable. The spirit’s power is backflowing.]
Ah, right. They said when her mental state got unstable, the spirit’s power would backflow. Damn it.
“Shido! Was the ‘important matter’ you mentioned meeting this girl?!”
“No, that’s not—”
Just as Itsuka-kun tried to explain, Yoshinon cut him off.
“Hey, big sis~?”
“It’s Tohka!”
“Tohka-chan, sorry, but it looks like Shido-kun’s already tired of you~”
At Yoshinon’s words, both Itsuka-kun and Tohka froze in shock. No, what the hell is that insane doll saying?!
“From what I hear, he ditched his promise with Tohka-chan and came to Yoshinon instead~ At this point—”
I felt like if I let her keep talking, there’d be no way to undo this, so I covered Yoshinon’s mouth.
“Haa... enough already, Yoshinon. Tohka, you too—”
“Move!”
“Ghk!”
Tohka shoved me aside, and I rolled across the floor. Tohka’s physical abilities had already surpassed normal human levels because of the spirit power backflow.
“Yay~ Sorry! Yoshinon was just too charming, so I couldn’t help it~! It’s not like Tohka-chan did anything wrong~? But you can’t blame Shido-kun for leaving Tohka-chan and coming to Yoshinon~”
“Agh!”
The moment her mouth was unblocked, Yoshinon immediately provoked Tohka. Thanks to that, Tohka, on the verge of tears, swung her arm and knocked Shido out cold. Huh?
“Shido-kun, say it too~ ‘I don’t need Tohka-chan anymore!’”
“I’m not unnecessary!”
In the end, Tohka couldn’t take it anymore and snatched Yoshinon away. Yoshino, having her doll suddenly ripped away, fell backward, and Tohka continued to berate Yoshinon.
“You said Shido could stay here! Don’t mock me any further! Say something! Hey! Why are you keeping your mouth shut? Say it!”
But no matter how much she yelled, once Yoshinon had been taken from Yoshino’s hands, she had reverted to an ordinary doll. Perhaps because Yoshinon had been taken, Yoshino’s eyes filled with tears as she tugged at Tohka’s collar.
“What is it! I’m dealing with this thing right now and—”
“P-please... give it back...”
Because of the height difference between Tohka and Yoshino, even when Yoshino jumped up to try and reclaim Yoshinon, she couldn’t reach.
[What are you doing, Shido! Yoshinon’s mental state is a mess too! Hurry up and stop them!]
Itsuka-kun, who had gotten back up at some point, followed the commander’s orders and tried to stop Tohka.
“U-um, Tohka. Could you... give that back?”
That was wrong. After Yoshinon’s words had made Tohka believe that Itsuka-kun really would abandon her, he should have been explaining the situation to her, not taking Yoshino’s side.
“Shido, so I really am less important than this girl...!”
“No, that’s not it!”
“<Zadkiel (Frozen Puppet)>!!!”
In the end, Yoshino, having reached the limit of her patience, summoned her angel. The angel that appeared looked like some kind of rabbit monster.
“Oh, crap.”
GRAAAH!
When the rabbit monster let out a shriek, the area around us began freezing over. Damn it, I have bad memories of cold attacks.
[She manifested her angel at a time like this?! This is bad! Run! Shido! Hiki!]
“An angel?!”
“I mean Tohka’s [Sandalphon]!”
The moment I said that, sharp chunks of ice suddenly began raining down on us.
“Everyone, take cover!”
“Tohka!”
Itsuka-kun dragged Tohka behind a nearby bookshelf, and I equipped the massive Havel's Greatshield from my inventory and hid behind it.
Clang! Clang! Clang! Clang...
By the time the sound of ice chunks battering the shield died down, I peeked out from the side and saw that Yoshino was already gone, leaving only a destroyed wall in her wake.
“Is everyone all right!”
When my shout went unanswered, I was overwhelmed by a rising sense of unease and ran to where they’d taken cover.
“Tohka?”
“Don’t touch me! Shido would obviously care more about her than me anyway!”
Thankfully, nothing had happened to either of them. No, wait—if Tohka was sulking, maybe that counted as something happening. Still, while I was worrying about them, they were having a lovers’ quarrel. That was kind of annoying.
[Oh dear, oh dear. A tricky event has occurred.]
As I was thinking that, the commander’s voice came through the intercom. Since I had a question, I might as well ask.
“Ah, hold on, Commander.”
[Hm? What is it?]
“You’ve been saying ‘Hiki’ this whole time. Who is that?”
[Huh? Obviously you.]
“...What?”
[Are your ears blocked or something? You. Higakieta is too long, so I shortened it to ‘Hiki.’]
“Commander. Don’t shorten my name like that.”
[Why, what’s the problem?]
“Anyone hearing that would think of a shut-in!!!”
Are you seriously making fun of my name right now?!
[What else is the issue? It’s not my name, so it’s fine.]
That damn commander!!!
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