Urokodaki encouraged me, saying "Well done," when I returned after passing the selection.
At his composed attitude, Kuwajima stuck out his lips and said, "Be more happy for him!" but when he saw that dinner that evening was lavishly prepared with only my favorite foods, he changed his tune and poked Urokodaki's arm with a grin.
I'll skip the details, but I note that Urokodaki's shoulder throw was excellent. He probably sent him flying about five tatami mats away.
"There was a mutated demon?"
"Yes."
Chewing on the salmon mixed rice served for dinner, I reported everything that happened on Mt. Fujikasane without omission.
That there was a mutated demon. That the demon hated Urokodaki. That it had survived over ten years on the mountain, and so on.
"...I see, there was such a demon."
"Does no one inspect Mt. Fujikasane?"
"No. It should be done regularly..."
Really?
They kept such a demon confined for ten years?
"Demons eat each other, and they get cut down during each selection, so their numbers decrease. The members who inspect it must have been there to maintain a certain number."
Kuwajima said while crunching on pickles. The pickles Urokodaki made himself seemed to suit his taste, as he had been chewing on them constantly since earlier. He looked like he was going to finish off all the pickles in the house.
Every time the pickles disappeared from the table, I sliced and served more, but now it's bothersome, so from next time, I should just let him chew on the whole jar.
"As Kuwajima said, there are members who patrol Mt. Fujikasane. If a mutated demon had appeared, a report would have come up first."
"Then why was there such a demon..."
"Perhaps the demon was hiding somewhere out of fear of being disposed of? That's why we didn't know."
"Is that so..."
It made sense, but something felt unsatisfactory.
"By the way, exterminating all the demons on the mountain. That's impressive."
"And with a broken sword at that. What a reckless thing to do."
"A selection with no casualties, I've never heard of that. No, seriously, you really picked up a good one, Urokodaki."
"...Ah, I see. You really did well."
I thought I would be scolded for going around saving people. I believed I would never be praised for disrupting the selection system.
But the two of them did not blame me for helping other participants; instead, they praised me. With relieved faces, they said it was something they couldn't bear to see children dying.
However, from the Demon Slayer Corps' perspective, excluding personal feelings, my actions still didn't seem very desirable.
"Lord Kagaya will be furious. 'Don't increase weak swordsmen~' Hey, Rei. Even if you meet him, don't make eye contact."
"I understand your thought that life is precious. But help can lead to laziness. And if you go to the battlefield in a lazy state, many lives will be threatened. You know that, right?"
"Yes... But I think it's cruel for people to die in an exam."
"Rei."
Urokodaki shook his head. With a heavy gesture.
"That is not an exam but a selection. It's not about being tested as a swordsman, but only swordsmen who can kill demons are selected. Understand that point well."
"......."
No logical rebuttal came to mind. Yet, I couldn't suppress the anger I felt seeing young children dying meaninglessly.
As I fell silent and pondered, Kuwajima brought up this.
"If you don't like the selection method, become a Pillar and propose it to the higher-ups."
"Become a Pillar?"
"You're a rookie now, still wet behind the ears. No one will seriously listen to a rookie who hasn't even been on their first mission spouting nonsense. But if you rise to Pillar, the story changes. Your words carry weight, and no one can ignore you. Even if immediate improvement is impossible, it creates room to ask for consideration at least once."
"...Urokodaki, what should I do? Kuwajima is saying something really smart!"
"Gooood, come to the dojo after you digest everything in your stomach. I'll spar with you until you vomit gastric juice."
Kuwajima flared up like that, but it couldn't be helped. It was hard to believe that the person who had been devouring pickles mindlessly until just now said such things. When I handed him my pickles instead of apologizing, his anger subsided instantly.
That aside... Pillar. Hmm, Pillar. Indeed, there was such a method.
"Rei, don't take Kuwajima's words too literally. Becoming a Pillar is not something so easy."
"Well, it's certainly a rough path as it's the core of the Demon Slayer Corps... but there are privileges."
"Privileges?"
"You get unlimited salary."
"I'll definitely become a Pillar!!"
When I answered immediately, I received a pitiful look from Urokodaki. No, it's not because I want a life of leisure.
If I can earn a lot of salary, I might be able to work on the stalled demon cure research. Experimental equipment and medicinal ingredients are expensive, so I couldn't easily touch them, but I started to see a glimmer of hope.
Add one more to the goals of this life.
I will become a Pillar of the Demon Slayer Corps!
・
・
・
Ten days later, a person wearing a red mask visited the mansion.
"That mask... Are you a relative of Urokodaki?"
"No, I'm a swordsmith."
It wasn't. I just mistook him because of the red mask; he was my assigned swordsmith. It seemed he came to deliver my sword.
As soon as I gripped the sword, the blade turned purple as expected. The swordsmith Tetsuido was very surprised, saying purple is a rare color.
"Caw! First mission! My first mission as a demon slayer!"
Just when I was feeling proud after being praised for the good wisteria color that slays demons, a mission was issued from the Kasugai Crow. As if it had been waiting for me to receive the sword.
This Kasugai Crow must be a rookie, as it was more enthusiastic about work than I was.
The mission content was simple. Find and eliminate the demon lurking near a certain mountain village where casualties were occurring.
Since it was a joint mission, instructions followed to meet up with another member along the way, so as I ran following the Kasugai Crow's guidance, I encountered a familiar face.
"Lord Shōjuro."
"So it's you. Let's do our best."
"Likewise."
"It's both our first missions. Let's not let our guard down, stay sharp."
"Yeah."
I was still fully armed with a mask, hood, and thick clothes for sunblock and to block视线, so it was fortunate that I was accompanying Lord Shōjuro, who knew my circumstances.
I ran with Lord Shōjuro along the path as the sun set in the west. At this rate, we should reach the destination before night falls completely.
"By the way, Rei. Are you wearing some perfume or something?"
"I'm not... Oh, this is the smell of medicine."
"Medicine? Are you unwell somewhere?"
"No, I apply medicine that blocks sunlight because I'm weak to it."
"Ah, that's right. I heard people with your appearance are weak to sunlight."
"Does it smell strange? Sorry. I tried hard to improve it to remove the smell, but no matter what I do, it won't get any lighter."
Compared to the original medicine my mother made, the smell is much suppressed, but it might bother sensitive people.
When I suggested running apart, Lord Shōjuro immediately answered, "I don't mind," so I gratefully accepted and kept the distance as is. However, I decided to run slightly behind him, being a bit considerate.
Lord Shōjuro's braided hair, tied back, shook perkily as he ran. Watching it, I somehow started to feel hungry. Was it just me?
No, you see, the Rengoku family's hair is golden, right? And the tips are red, right? Golden braided hair with red tips reminds me of fried shrimp.
Alright, after we defeat the demon, I'll coax Lord Shōjuro to go eat tempura. I hope it's a豪华 version with two large fried shrimp. Tempura set meal is fine too.
Ah, but can I dine out with this appearance? It might be difficult.
Before my first mission, which hadn't even ended yet, I was making such leisurely thoughts, unaware.
The demon we found was my mother.
＊
"Why didn't you cut off her neck?"
I sincerely thought it was good that I was wearing a mask. My face must be terribly distorted right now.
"You were within striking distance. So why didn't you swing your sword? Did you pity her because she was a woman?"
I couldn't see Lord Shōjuro's face properly. But even without seeing it, I could tell from his voice what kind of face it was.
A voice lowered as if suppressing anger struck my ears. It felt like I was being hit by the voice.
"...I'm sorry."
After night fell, we finished patrolling the mountain village and were guarding the nearby forest when we noticed a suspicious presence. Lord Shōjuro asked for identification, but the other didn't respond.
As soon as it saw the Corps uniform, it ran away, and we concluded it was a demon. We split into two to chase the fleeing entity, and it was my side that cornered it.
The moment I raised my sword to aim for its neck, I finally saw the demon's appearance properly.
Lustrous hair as black as crow feathers. Widely opened wisteria-colored eyes. White beauty reflected by moonlight. Beauty revealed under the full moon.
That was undoubtedly my mother from long ago.
Even though hundreds of years had passed since the day she became a demon, my mother's appearance hadn't changed at all, as if glimpsed from my memory. That vividness bound my thoughts to the past.
Cutting off the demon's neck was impossible. Because I knew she was my mother.
Calling her mother was also impossible. Because Lord Shōjuro's eyes were watching.
In the end, unable to move in either direction, my mother disappeared into what seemed to be a demon art illusion, and Lord Shōjuro sent a disappointed look. Thus, I ended up in this helpless state.
"...You were bewitched by demon art. Just this once. Let's leave it at that."
That was by no means words forgiving me. It was just something uttered because there was no room to reprimand now.
"Let's split into two to find the demon. You search the mountains, and I'll guard near the village. ...This time, don't hesitate."
Leaving behind a cold voice, Lord Shōjuro turned his back and started walking. Then, he suddenly stopped and looked back over his shoulder. Flame-like eyes, cooled with disappointment, pierced straight through me.
"Answer?"
"...Yes."
"Good."
Lord Shōjuro, who resumed walking, never looked back this way again. I also turned my back and staggered into the mountains. With ghostly footsteps that made me doubt if I could even face a demon.
I have to find my mother before Lord Shōjuro does.
Otherwise, my mother will be killed.
But even if I find her first, what should I do then?
The medicine to turn demons back into humans isn't complete yet. From my past life until now, there's been no progress.
I should have made some advancement instead of making excuses about not being able to buy materials or lacking preparation.
I'm a fool. I believed everything would flow as planned. Life doesn't flow like compounding medicine.
What should I do? I got the order wrong. What should I do, what should I do, what should I do.
I don't know what to do.
What should I do in such times? Teach me, Mom. I don't know. I don't know.
Were the deaths in the mountains my mother's doing? How many people has my mother killed? Eaten.
Being able to use demon art means a strong demon. A strong demon is one that has eaten many humans.
Then my mother, who used demon art, my mother who became that strong—ah, that's what it means in the end.
"Mom..."
I take off the mask. The night wind brushing against my wet cheek is cold.
"Mom, where are you?"
As my vision blurs, the night soon loses its轮廓, and with a feeling of being swallowed by darkness, I call for my mother.
"Where are you?"
Will my mother recognize me? Or is it already a forgotten past?
"Mom, Mom...!"
Has she even forgotten that she was human, and her heart has become a demon?
I call for my mother with a voice thinner than the wind. I call for my mother as if tracing that happy memory.
But no matter how much I call—
—Why are you like this, what's wrong?
Such a kind auditory hallucination did not tickle my ears.
＊
"Mom, Mom, where are you... Please come out..."
To him sobbing like that, I didn't know what words to offer. I carefully left the spot so as not to reveal my presence.
I regretted following him, blaming myself for perhaps speaking too harshly. I resented myself for worrying whether he could actually cut off the neck if he faced that demon again.
Because of that, I learned something I shouldn't have.
Unlike my heavy footsteps, my heart pounded violently. The February cold seeped into my skin, and unpleasant sweat trickled down my back.
Even the sensation under my feet became模糊, ah, am I really moving forward properly now? I was more agitated than I had ever been in my life.
'Mom... of all things.'
Who that flowed from his mouth referred to, there's only one person.
The elegant woman in floral kimono, black hair that suited moonlight well—that female demon.
Was it an illusion of his mother seen through demon art? ...No, that female demon used demon art only once when escaping.
It wasn't harmful either, just obstructing vision, and by no means the kind that digs into people's hearts. I was also blinded, but I didn't see any illusion that bewitched the mind.
'...Then, is that really your mother?'
Did that female demon realize that the fox-masked boy she encountered was her own child?
I sincerely hoped she hadn't noticed. Not for the female demon's sake, but for him, who was searching for his mother like a lost child.
It's obvious what attitude a demon would show upon realizing that the swordsman trying to kill her is her own child.
Bewitching with sweet words to make her let her guard down and then betraying, blaming the child who holds a sword, or in the end, not even considering him her child and eating him—it's certain.
Demons are ugly beings. Terrifying creatures that make others prey to fill their own stomachs.
'And yet, you call that demon mother.'
The corpses found around the mountain village were probably that demon's doing. Given that she used demon art, it's clear that demon has eaten a considerable number of people.
Quietly exhale and take a deep breath.
Calm the混乱 mind.
'Before that, I have to find that demon.'
And cut her down.
Surely, he won't be able to cut her.
So instead, I will cut her.
'...Will I be resented?'
Even if I am resented, it's what must be done. As the eldest son of the Rengoku family, a demon-slaying lineage, I must fulfill my duty. Ugly demons that eat people must be exterminated.
Even if it's the mother of the boy I wanted to be friends with.
＊
There was the smell of medicine.
The smell of medicine that only I and that child knew how to make.
Compared to what I made in the past, it's much lighter, but there's no mistaking that unique smell.
That medicine was something I devised from scratch with great effort. It was medicine I painstakingly made after trial and error, pitying that child who couldn't bask in sunlight. The same smell couldn't be made by coincidence.
In other words, that boy, that fox-masked child, is probably—
—Has the sadness of eating your family healed somewhat by now?
One night, ten years after eating my husband and child.
On a night when I, driven mad by despair, was turning a village into ruins, that man came to me.
—Don't bare your fangs like that. I've come to take you with me.
Without a care for my resentment, the man bared his fangs as if mocking.
—Don't you want to meet your child? Yes. The white-haired, red-eyed boy you ate.
The man's words made no sense at all. I even thought he was mocking me for greedily eating my family.
Dead people don't come back to life. No matter how much human medicine and pharmacology advance, once dead, they cannot be brought back.
But the man chuckled at my reaction and continued.
—That one, even if dead, cries its first cry again. Even if in a womb other than yours, your child is born as your child.
It felt like hearing language from a place as distant as the universe, something I couldn't understand at all.
But even if words don't convey, people's expressions are the same in any world. Even if I didn't understand what the man meant, I could understand his expression.
The man was smiling. In a way that didn't suit the situation at all, beautifully smiling. Such unpleasant beauty was something I had never experienced in my life.
—I am looking for that one, your child. Cooperate. Submit to me. Don't you want to apologize to the child you ate?
Ah, I might forget. That disgusting smile. Lips parted like insectivorous flowers luring insects.
That man, Kibutsuji Muzan, was a monster who filled a meat sack decorated with only表面 beauty with the ugliness of the world.
"So this is what you meant, Kibutsuji Muzan...!"
Even after freeing myself from that man's control, the meaning of those words still eluded me.
But tonight, I finally understood. The meaning of my child being reborn, I realized through smell.
The word reincarnation crossed my mind. It's hard to believe, but that child is probably one born through such a process. Looking back, there were more than one or two things that made sense.
Since that child was around the age of reason, I vaguely felt he was different from ordinary children. He knew things I hadn't taught him or did things he shouldn't have known. Surely, from the moment I gave birth, that child was already on the path of reincarnation.
The child I gave birth to after labor pains was not a pure white new life.
But I didn't think it was scary or creepy.
That child born from someone other than me—I still loved him unchanged. I feel sorry for his current mother, but I can proudly say he is my child.
The heart overflowing with joy at meeting that child again, the warm tears flowing down my cheeks now, were the utmost proof that I am a mother.
Just recalling his height, grown so much from memory, his larger palms, fills me with affection. He was so small and young, his hands as lovely as maple leaves... You've grown.
The six-year-old you I ate and killed, in this life, you were able to grow up safely.
That child must have realized my identity.
That's why he couldn't swing his sword.
Feeling relief at that fact, shame washed over me for feeling even a微弱 joy, which was impious.
How wonderful it would have been if I could hug that child grown to my eye level. I wanted to apologize for causing tragedy because I, as a mother, was weak.
I wanted to smile especially brightly so that child could overlay the scary me he last saw. I wanted to repay that child who said he wanted my remembered image to be a smiling face.
But that cannot be. I am a demon, and that child is of the Demon Slayer Corps.
For the Demon Slayer Corps, whose mission is demon extermination, having a demon in the family is evil in itself.
I must not make that child's position precarious because of me.
I run through the night, flapping my kimono hem hideously as if floundering in mud. I had to abandon life in that mountain village and flee far away quickly. I have something I must do.
"I cannot die. I cannot die...! Until that demon, Kibutsuji Muzan, is annihilated...!"
At first, it was a desire for revenge born from having my husband and child taken. But now that I know of that child's reincarnation, Kibutsuji Muzan's annihilation has become an utmost precious mission for me.
Kibutsuji Muzan is looking for the white-haired, red-eyed child. He is targeting my child. I don't know the reason.
But that man was obsessed with overcoming sunlight and spared no resources for research towards it. He used anything as material for medicine.
Plants, minerals, beasts, even demons and humans, he ground, filtered, and mixed them equally, handling them as if dealing with medicinal ingredients. Cruelly, without human heart.
I can only think that's why that man is obsessed with the white-haired, red-eyed child.
Kibutsuji Muzan is an obstacle that will disrupt that child's peace. I must kill him, kill him completely without leaving a single piece, and protect my child's peace myself.
That was the only atonement allowed for sinful me. The last mission left for me as a mother.
"Do you think I'll hand him over? Kibutsuji Muzan, do you think I'll hand over my child to someone like you!"
Biting my lips with determination, I run, run through the black mountains. I was thinking of fleeing, cutting off everything like that—
"Kyaaaaaaaaaaah!"
A scream tearing the night's stillness. The sound echoing from the mountain village side felt like a blow to the back of my head. A demon had appeared. Probably the one that had been lurking around this area for weeks.
If my hiding place is invaded, I'm helpless, so until now, I've used demon art to disrupt demon perception and prevent intrusion, but tonight I haven't shed blood yet, and the village was exposed defenseless. That's why it was detected.
Should I go back? My toes hesitated, wavering. The scream now must have reached that child and the Demon Slayer boy with him. They'll go to exterminate it immediately.
While that demon rampages, I can escape safely.
But what if it's a strong demon? A ferocious one that two boys can't handle. If that child, who grew up safely, dies again this time.
Thinking that, the hesitation at my toes vanished.
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