The first time Eto realized she was different from her father, it began with something as trivial as a single action.
That day remains vivid in her memory.
As usual, she had thrown herself into her father’s arms when he returned from work. He gave a wry smile, sounding troubled as he warned her that he’d been sweating and probably smelled, but Eto didn’t find the scent unpleasant. If anything, the stronger his scent became, the more she felt something swelling within her heart.
It was just another ordinary day.
Just another ordinary moment of clinginess.
There was also a flicker of impish mischief in her—a childish urge to see her father flustered just a little more.
She bit his arm.
Just a little.
She was certain it had only been a light bite.
But in that instant, Eto’s body slipped beyond her control.
Crunch!
It was a sound that no mere light bite should ever have produced.
A rapture she had never experienced before surged through her mouth.
The taste was entirely different from the “meat” her father brought home. Eto couldn’t come to her senses for a long while, as if she had been intoxicated by a shot of potent liquor.
Ignoring the sound, she chewed and swallowed the essence of pleasure flowing into her mouth.
As if in response, a hot sigh escaped from the depths of her lungs. A dangerous, dizzying sensuality—one that no five-year-old should possess—masked Eto’s youthful features.
Then, she snapped back to reality.
Before her was a large pool of blood staining the floor, her father collapsed on the ground clutching his arm, and his face twisted as he bit his lip hard enough to bleed, enduring the pain.
Huh…? Huh…?
I… did that?
I… ate… Dad?
She was lost in confusion.
She couldn’t believe that the person who had hurt her father—the one who had just been happily chewing on his flesh—was truly herself.
As Eto collapsed and burst into tears, he approached her, suppressing his injury.
“It’s okay.”
With his unharmed arm, he pulled Eto into an embrace, hiding his pain and speaking in the same calm tone he always used.
He soothed her, telling her over and over that everything was fine.
Eto cried herself to sleep in his arms.
When she woke, the house had been cleaned so thoroughly it felt as if it had all been a dream. Her father was in the kitchen, looking as usual while he cooked.
Had it really been a dream?
No.
Her father’s right arm.
Bandages were wrapped around the spot Eto had bitten.
To Eto, who remained trapped in the confusion of her actions, her father finally revealed the truth.
That she was a being called a Ghoul.
A being that could not survive without eating human flesh.
That if people discovered she was a Ghoul, many would come to hate her.
And that it would draw the Ghoul’s “natural enemy.”
Her father earnestly pleaded with Eto never to tell anyone. He warned her that if she did, they might be separated forever.
Eto kept that promise.
She didn’t want to be separated from her father. She didn’t want to be hated.
If anyone ever found out… she would have to silence them.
Without fail.
That was why Eto revealed her identity to the woman she met on the cliff.
To drive herself into a corner.
To find the courage to push the woman over the edge with her own hands.
To confirm “death” with her own eyes.
***
“……”
“……”
Silence stretched between them.
The woman stared at Eto, not even noticing that her cigarette had burned down to the filter.
What will her reaction be? The best outcome would be for her to dismiss it as a child’s prank.
If she let her guard down, Eto’s ambush would be far more likely to succeed.
“A Ghoul… huh.”
Finally, the woman spoke.
“I see.”
Click. Hoooo….
That was all.
She flicked away the spent butt and lit a fresh cigarette. That was the entirety of her reaction.
She wasn’t flustered, nor did she deny Eto’s words. She simply accepted the fact and moved on.
Eto was the one thrown off by the unexpected response.
“You don’t believe me?”
“No, I do. At least, I don’t think you’re lying. I mean…”
The woman held up the cigarette, pointing the tip toward Eto’s hand.
“I don’t think you’d be shaking that badly over a little prank.”
“……!”
Was it because of what she was about to do? Eto hadn’t even realized her own hands were trembling so pitifully.
She braced herself inwardly.
It was fine. A Ghoul’s physical abilities were formidable, even in a child. She could even beat her father at arm wrestling—assuming he wasn’t letting her win.
All she had to do was push with both hands.
She would kill this woman and witness the thing gnawing at her father with her own eyes.
Then, she would take it for herself.
She would no longer let her father bear that heavy burden alone.
The woman quietly observed Eto, whose expression held a seriousness far beyond her years, and spoke.
“You’re trying to kill me?”
“Have you suddenly decided you want to live?”
“Not really. I don’t even have the courage to end my own life, so if someone else wants to do it for me, I couldn’t ask for more.”
The woman calmly inhaled, seemingly indifferent to whatever Eto intended to do once she got close.
What a strange person, Eto thought.
Wasn’t it the basic instinct of all living things, humans included, to struggle for survival when faced with death? Or was she acting, trying to trick Eto into a false sense of security to escape?
Eto remained vigilant.
Regardless, the woman continued to talk, as if she simply wanted to chat.
“But why are you here alone? Ghouls have parents too, don’t they?”
“……My parents are human.”
“…………Wow. Really?”
The woman seemed more shocked by this than by the revelation that Eto was a Ghoul. She fell silent for a moment before finally finding her voice.
“Sounds like you’ve got a complicated situation. A human raising a Ghoul… your parents must have it rough.”
Throb.
If this had been a tactic to create an opening for escape, it would have succeeded.
But seeing Eto flinch, the woman made no move to run.
“Sorry. I guess I hit a sore spot…”
Instead, she apologized, blaming her own tactlessness for hurting the girl.
That apology caused tears to well up in Eto’s eyes. Seeing this, the woman stepped down from the guardrail and approached her.
Startled!
Eto reflexively shifted into a defensive stance, but the woman reached out as if the threat meant nothing to her.
Her hand gently stroked Eto’s head.
“……”
Eto remained tense, but before long, she found herself leaning into the touch.
It was a rough, clumsy touch, unlike her father’s. Yet, it carried a similar kind of “affection.”
“……I see. So that’s why you came here alone. Because your parents are human and you’re a Ghoul. Because until now, they’ve been the ones providing the food you need. You didn’t want them to suffer for your sake, did you?”
Eto nodded.
“I see. You’re a good daughter. But I can’t say it’s a wise decision. A piece of meat on a dinner table doesn’t show you how cruel the world really is. You have to go to the slaughterhouse yourself—watch the cattle and pigs die, watch them be butchered—before you truly understand that we are all part of that cruel nature. But you’re far too young to be seeking that kind of understanding.”
Eto wiped her tears and looked up at the woman.
She could feel a genuine, heartfelt sincerity in the woman’s advice.
It was as if the woman had become the mother Eto had never known.
“Your parents would never want this for you. It would leave a scar on your young heart that would never fade.”
“I don’t care.”
Eto did not waver. Her resolve was absolute.
“Dad is taking the wounds I’m supposed to bear. His heart is already covered in scars. I don’t want that. If I have to be hurt, I’d rather it happen now. I won’t let any more pain pile up on top of Dad’s scars.”
“……How admirable. In that case, I suppose I have no choice.”
The woman withdrew her hand and stood up, opening her cigarette pack.
“There’s only one left. Will you wait until I finish this one?”
“……?”
As Eto tilted her head in confusion, the woman lit the cigarette and took a deep drag.
Hoooooo….
Watching the smoke vanish into the air, the woman suddenly spoke.
“You know, I had an abortion once.”
“Abor…tion…?”
Eto didn’t know the word, but the sorrow in the woman’s voice was unmistakable.
“It means erasing a baby. I was a bit wild back then. I lived recklessly, doing all sorts of stupid things without a thought for the future, and eventually, I messed up. I got pregnant by a man I didn’t even know, and my parents pressured me to get rid of it. They asked how I could possibly raise a child without a father.”
Hoooooo….
“But after the baby was gone… I never had a day of peace. It felt as if I’d erased a part of my own heart along with the child. Whenever I see someone else’s child, I think of the one I erased. That feeling never left me, no matter how many years passed. I’d think, ’If I hadn’t done it, they’d be this big by now. If they were still alive, they’d be just like that child over there.’”
Hoooooo….
“It was about five or six years ago… so if I had become that child’s mother, they would be exactly your age now.”
The woman wasn’t crying, but to Eto, she looked as if she were.
It looked as though she had cried so much that she had run out of tears, leaving only an invisible sorrow to stream down her cheeks.
“Ah…”
Just as Eto was about to speak, the woman flicked away her final cigarette and smiled.
“I’ll give you my ‘death’ as a gift.”
“……!!”
The woman spread her arms and leaned over the guardrail, as if lying down in a bed.
“It’ll be painful, and it’ll be hard… but live on stubbornly.”
Before Eto could react,
the woman smiled with the peace of someone finally setting down a crushing burden.
And then, she vanished over the edge of the cliff.
Comments (0)
Please log in to leave a comment. Login or Register