I honestly couldn’t even remember what the premium eel rice bowl tasted like—the one a senior Sidekick had boldly paid for after winning fifty thousand yen at Toto.
For dozens of minutes, I barely chewed as I crammed rice into my mouth and blankly watched the second hand tick by. After enduring the seniors’ mischievous teasing and my aunt’s barrage of satisfied looks with my entire body, it was finally time for Nejire to arrive at the agency after finishing school.
Hiss—
The glass automatic doors in the lobby opened, and familiar footsteps rang out.
"…"
Normally, the blue-haired fairy would have burst in hard enough to break the doors, bouncing around and making the entire agency ring with her voice.
But the Nejire who entered today was the complete opposite of her usual endlessly energetic self. Clutching her bag strap tightly in both hands, she shuffled forward as if creeping in, her face red from the crown of her head to the nape of her neck like a thoroughly boiled tomato.
"H-hello…"
Nejire trailed off after greeting us in a tiny, mosquito-like voice.
At that moment, the entire noisy agency fell into perfect silence as though everyone had planned it.
There was me, sitting stiffly on the sofa with my ears burning red, and an intern high school girl fidgeting in the middle of the lobby with her gaze lowered to the floor.
Every Sidekick senior, my aunt, and even the desk staff held their breath, staring at us, glowing pink, with the most fascinated expressions imaginable. Their blatant gazes pricked my entire body like needles.
The black inverted-cross piercing in my left earlobe trembled as if detecting overheating, while the [3x3 Cube] floating above my left shoulder clicked its gears together.
It was obvious that if I tried to spout some half-baked sophistry or narcissistic drivel here, those hyena-like seniors would preserve me as teasing material for the rest of my life. So the complex calculation circuits of my internal supercomputer reached their final conclusion in 0.1 seconds.
…Ah, fuck it. I don’t know.
I shot to my feet, strode over, and grabbed Nejire’s small white wrist in one hand.
Nejire froze, lifting her blue eyes wide at the sudden touch with a, "Ah…?!" In that instant, I pushed up my rimless glasses and shamelessly declared to the Sidekicks and my aunt gathered in the lobby.
"Director, effective today, Nejire is being placed on emergency paid leave."
"…What?!"
"I’m forcibly requisitioning her as the dedicated mental-care officer for tomorrow’s future top-ranked entrance exam admittee. Just so you know."
The second I finished speaking, I gripped Nejire’s hand tightly and flipped the spatial-compression switch in an instant.
• Target route: Downtown Tokyo beyond the agency’s front entrance.
• Ground friction coefficient: zero (0).
Fshhh—!
The moment the two of us folded space-time in the center of the lobby and vanished as if it were a lie—
"Woooooah—!!"
"He dragged her out!! That was insanely bold!!"
The Sidekick seniors’ ecstatic cheers and applause erupted loudly enough to shake the agency lobby, swallowing Ryukyu’s dumbfounded laughter as they rang across Tokyo’s afternoon sky.
.
.
.
After folding through space-time a couple of times, we landed in front of a department store at Tokyo’s largest shopping district.
"Haa… haa…!"
Gasping from the sudden spatial jump, Nejire looked down at our clasped hands.
Her entire palm was blazing hot like a furnace, and her fair cheeks were so red they looked ready to burst.
Yet although her fingertips trembled, far from letting go of my hand, she quietly threaded her fingers through mine and held on even tighter.
The heartbeat transmitted through our clasped hands made my brainstem sizzle, but I forced myself to act composed and lightly pushed my rimless glasses up the bridge of my nose with my index finger.
Making the [3x3 Cube] orbiting fifteen centimeters above my left shoulder rotate with a tick, tick, I nodded toward the gleaming revolving doors.
"All right, Nejire. Today is the historic fashion show of U.A.’s next top-ranked admittee, so brace yourself. I’ll give you the chance to fully demonstrate your discerning eye as my appraiser."
"…Huh?! A f-fashion show?!"
Flustered, Nejire opened her blue eyes wide in her reddened face.
"W-wait, Yujin! The entrance exam is tomorrow! Is it really okay to go shopping at a department store when the test is right around the corner?! You should be studying or managing your condition!"
"Ha, Nejire."
I adjusted my hold on the back of her hand and let out a crooked smirk.
"What does a mere exam matter to these noble brain cells? The written test is elementary arithmetic, and as for the practical, I can pass at the top by using just 0.01% of my brain cells."
As I strode toward the department store’s extravagant escalators, I laid out the most shameless, self-assured sophistry in the world.
"And honestly, even if I don’t go to U.A.’s Hero Course, it won’t hurt my ability to make a living in the slightest. The most urgent and important physics calculation task in my life right now is putting together the perfect first-date outfit as the boyfriend of both a future superstar—me—and the woman who swept me right off my feet."
"…A f-first date?!"
At the direct hit of the word “date,” steam practically rose from the tips of Nejire’s ears.
Even as she was led into the department store by the hand, the corners of her lips drew a red curve of embarrassment and irrepressible excitement.
Forgetting all about the agency’s teasing and the tension of the approaching entrance exam, our first pink-tinged date began beneath Tokyo’s dazzling shop windows.
The instant we entered a boutique in the department store’s luxury wing, radiant chandelier light poured down over us.
"Welcome, custome—?!"
The employee’s eyes widened as though they might pop out. My neatly slicked-back black hair, lean physique, black inverted-cross piercing in my earlobe, and even the cybernetic cube quietly spinning above my shoulder.
Forgetting all the usual sales lines, the employee let out a pure exclamation of admiration.
Her eyes sparkling, the sales clerk began eagerly gathering shirts and blazers and presenting them to me as if putting her soul into it.
"Please try on this cobalt-blue oversized jacket! It goes perfectly with your skin tone and those sharp shoulder lines! Ah, and this silk tie blouse too…!"
Every time I emerged from the fitting room after drawing back the curtain, the employee clapped and kept looking around for a camera. Beside her, Nejire watched with shining eyes, resting her chin on her hand in rapt appreciation.
"Woooow! Yujin, everything looks so good on you! You look exactly like a fashion editorial model! But… yeah! This black long double-breasted coat with the dark gray shirt is the coolest! It has such a cold, devastating vibe!"
The outfit Nejire pointed to with both fists clenched truly showed the height of good taste.
"I’ll gladly accept my appraiser’s judgment."
I coolly paid for the black long coat in a single payment, swiped my card, then gestured toward the fitting room.
"All right, now it’s your turn. Let’s admire U.A.’s fairy fit too."
"Ehehe, I want to try some on too!"
Excited, Nejire hugged an armful of pastel dresses, off-the-shoulder knit tops, pleated skirts, and more before slipping into the fitting room.
A short while later, each time the curtain swished open, admiration sprang out all on its own.
When she wore a pale sky-blue chiffon dress and let her wavy blue hair cascade down, she was a forest fairy incarnate. When she put on a bright ivory off-the-shoulder knit top and a miniskirt, cuteness poured from her so brilliantly it was almost blinding. Customers passing through the department store corridor stopped in unison and stared at her in a daze.
But.
Sitting on the sofa with my legs crossed, I tapped the black inverted-cross piercing in my earlobe with a fingertip and deliberately drew my brows together behind my rimless glasses.
"…Sigh. They all fail."
"…Huh?! They fail?!"
Nejire, who had been standing there with her body twisted in anticipation, blinked blankly before turning pale and making a tearful face.
"N-no way…! None of them suit me? Do they all really look weird?! Aren’t they your type, Yujin?!"
Suppressing a laugh at the sight of the blue-haired fairy panicking and stamping her feet, I slowly rose from the sofa and strode toward her. Then, in a low voice, I shamelessly drove a straight shot into her ear.
"Nejire. It’s not that they all look weird. They all fail because you’re absurdly beautiful in every one of them."
"…What?"
"The guys walking through this department store are about to collectively fall over on the escalators because they’re staring at your face, you know? My noble frontal lobe is observing that spectacle in real time and is on the verge of overheating from running its jealousy circuits."
Making the [3x3 Cube] orbiting above my shoulder rotate with a tick, I gestured toward a baggy long padded coat and oversized hoodie farther inside the shop.
"You ought to cover up that dazzling fairy appearance completely in suitably dull, ugly sack-like clothes like those. For the peace of Tokyo, if nothing else."
One second of silence.
At the profoundly serious yet utterly childish jealousy on the face of the cold handsome man who had tossed aside his glasses, Nejire stood there with her mouth open in a daze—
"Ahahahaha—!!"
Then she finally burst out laughing, clutching her stomach.
"Pffft, ahaha! Yujin, what are you even saying?! You’re jealous?! Oh no, you’re so cuuute—!!"
Laughing loudly enough to fill the department store boutique, Nejire leaped straight into my arms. The laughter of the entrance-exam candidate blinded by jealousy and the blue-haired fairy laughing more happily than anyone in the world spread brightly beyond the shop windows.
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