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Chapter 14: Dead Man Pirates

In the darkness of the damp underground prison, the ominous clatter of chains echoed out.


At the deepest part of the hold aboard the prison ship bound for Impel Down, three enormous figures crouched beyond the iron bars, radiating vicious killing intent beneath the torchlight.


Breaking the heavy silence, Kuro of a Thousand Plans murmured in a low voice. In his usual chilling habit, the man used the wrist beneath his palm to push up his glasses, casting a wildcat’s gaze at his prey.


"You didn’t crawl down to the bottom of a Marine prison ship, jingling keys, to play philanthropist. What are you after?"


"What I’m after? My, what a bleak and colorless choice of words, my bespectacled friend."


I hooked a bottle of forty-year-aged rum around one finger and spun it as I slowly paced before the bars with my usual loose-limbed gait.


"I’ve merely come to offer the roughest, hardiest gentlemen on these seas a marvelous ‘shipboard employment contract’ that will turn their lives upside down."


"You...!"


At that moment, the eyes of the hulking man breathing harshly in the opposite cell—Don Krieg—shook violently.


A bead of cold sweat slid down Krieg’s forehead as he stood gripping the bars, his body wrapped in layers of bandages. The man remembered me perfectly. That mad eccentric swordsman who had casually crossed blades with the merciless black sword of the world’s greatest swordsman, Hawk Eyes Mihawk, off the coast of Baratie—and had somehow survived, then calmly robbed a ship and sailed away.


"That lunatic who wrecked my ship at Baratie...! What the hell are you doing here?!"


There was deep instinctive wariness and intimidation in the voice of Krieg, the man who called himself an admiral. He had seen firsthand that I was no bluffing vagabond, but a genuine fighter who had kept his life even before Mihawk.


"Oh, good to see you, Admiral Beard. Where’d you leave that shining armor of yours? Those bandages are quite fashionable, though."


I gave the brim of my tricorn hat a light flick, then turned my gaze toward the deepest darkness.


"The prattle of humans is not worth hearing."


From the darkness, Arlong growled low, the saw-like edge of his nose gleaming. The thick steel chains binding both his arms creaked tautly.


"Do you think a Fish-Man with a shark’s pride would pull ropes aboard the ship of some lowly human? I’ll tear your throat out...!"


"Oh, pride. Such noble, tear-jerking racial pride indeed."


I shrugged and leaned lazily against the bars.


"But, pointed-nose friend, if that grand Fish-Man pride means rotting like salted fish behind these damp iron bars... even the goddess of the sea would click her tongue and spit. Fish are at their finest when they cut through savage waves, aren’t they?"


"...Grrk."


Arlong’s blue jaw ground together. Even as he radiated killing intent, the cunning Fish-Man’s mind had already finished its practical calculations. If he could not get out of these bars, he would be thrown into a deep-sea prison where even sunlight never reached, left to rot away for the rest of his life. I put an unlit cigar between my lips, drew out a ring of brass keys, and spun it with my fingertips before stopping it right in front of their nostrils.


Jingle.


"There are only two laws in this world, gentlemen.


What a man can do, and what he cannot do.


You can quietly starve to death behind these iron bars...


Or you can raise anchor, spread the sails beneath me, and throw yourselves back into that vast sea."


My languid, cold gaze swept over the faces of the three big names in turn.


"And the terms of my contract are exceptionally chaotic and beautiful.


Sailing seven days a week, overnight watches at all hours, and rum rations no bigger than a rat’s tail!


And... from the moment we safely leave this harbor, I shall even guarantee you the ‘perfect freedom’ to throw me into the sea and attempt a mutiny."


I gave a faint laugh and spread my arms.


"Burn the rules. Add just a little chaos, and all that precious order and fate can be overturned in an instant. I may be a captain, but surely a voyage is less dull when one has audacious crewmen constantly scheming to take their captain’s head?"


"...You’re insane. Completely mad."


Kuro of a Thousand Plans pushed up his glasses with his wrist and let out a disbelieving snicker. It was the calculation of an intelligent criminal: once they escaped, all he had to do was slit this shameless drunk’s throat and seize the ship.


Krieg clenched his teeth and fists as well. He had seen the man’s ability before Mihawk; for now, joining hands was his only way out.


"Fine. I’ll board your mad ship."


"Excellent judgment, gentlemen!"


Clank!! Clatter!


The brass keys turned roughly, and the heavy iron doors all flew open at once.


Kuro of a Thousand Plans, Krieg, Arlong—and dozens of vicious criminals and deserters imprisoned along both sides of the corridor—tore free their chains and poured from the darkness.


It was the moment every bloodthirsty beast of East Blue gathered behind my back.


"All right, gentlemen! The feast is over; time to work! Get up on deck, haul the anchor cable, and spread those sails wide!"


Rumble—!!


As dozens of escapees seized the deck, the heavily armored prison ship began to rock with a tremendous roar.


Krieg snarled as he cranked up the anchor winch, while Arlong used his immense strength to tear apart the mooring ropes tying the ship to the dock with his bare hands.


Just as the ship was slowly beginning to turn its bow—


"Let me gooo!! Do you know who I am?! Anyone who laughed at me for having a red nose, I’ll blast them all to bits with cannon fire—!!"


"Shut up, clown! Stay tied up quietly until Colonel Smoker arrives!"


Through the rain, some ten Marines were dragging Buggy the Clown across the muddy ground, wrapped tightly in a thick net. Apparently, after being struck by lightning atop the execution platform and tumbling down, he had been caught in the Marine net.


"Huh? What’s that clown doing being dragged in under arrest?"


Leaning on the railing, Krieg clicked his tongue.


"Leave him and set sail! There’s no reason to bring some insignificant clown aboard!"


"Now, now, don’t be so cold-hearted, my bearded friend."


I set my rum bottle down and lightly climbed atop the railing.


"That fellow is a valuable comrade in navigation who has already handed his ship over to me, and a proper member of my fleet. It is not a pirate captain’s way to leave his own crewman in the mud and turn tail."


"Bullshit—!!"


Before the men’s shouts even brushed past my ears, I leaped from the railing into the air, slicing through the rain.


Swoosh—crash!


Sliding into the muddy ground, I swept the ankles out from under two Marines with my signature loose-footed movement.


"Aagh?!" "Wh-what?!"


As the Marines tumbled like bowling pins, I drew a dagger from my waist and sliced through the thick net binding Buggy in a single stroke.


Slash!


"Uh... uhh?! Jack?!"


The freed Buggy rolled his eyes white in shock.


"Y-you came to save me?!"


"Save the tearful reunion for later and get aboard, Red Nose. This ship won’t run itself—you need to at least handle deck-swabbing."


"I said I’m not Red Noseee—!!"


Buggy shrieked, sending his separated body flying through the air as he scrambled aboard the prison ship’s deck.


A perfect rescue. Now all I had to do was climb the rope and return to the ship myself.


But then—


Ssssssizzle.


Through the pouring rain, thick, pure-white smoke that neither rain nor wind could scatter began to spread across the stone ground at a terrifying speed.


The air settled with icy coldness. Every raindrop that touched the smoke evaporated white with a chilling crackle.


Thud. Thud.


Tearing through the thick haze, a massive silver-haired man appeared, two enormous cigars clenched in his mouth.


A man carrying a bizarre cross-shaped iron bar on his back, both hands shoved into the pockets of his coat as he radiated cold killing intent.


It was Colonel Smoker of Marine Headquarters, the White Hunter.


"...I wondered what gutter this stray had rolled out of."


Smoker’s gaze swept over Kuro of a Thousand Plans, Krieg, and Arlong standing in formation on the prison ship’s deck, before finally locking viciously onto my face as I stood alone upon the dock.


"Captain Jack Sparrow, petty thief pirate with a ten-million-Berry bounty."


The man’s low voice thundered across the dock.


"While Straw Hat caused a riot in the square, you looted Headquarters’ prison ship and rounded up every piece of East Blue trash you could find."


"Oh, Colonel."


I edged backward and casually tapped my tricorn hat.


"I merely spotted a ship abandoned by the roadside on my way home and requisitioned it for an emergency. The roads are treacherous in this rain—why not put away that vicious smoke and have some tea at a tavern?"


"Save your mouth for behind iron bars."


Smoker’s eyes flashed with murderous blue light.


Whoooosh!!


In an instant, the man’s entire lower body transformed into a massive storm of smoke, launching him from the ground and into the air.


"[White Blow]!!"


Propelled by white smoke, his fist tore through the rain toward my face like a cannonball.


...Damn it!


With a staggering motion, I bent my upper body backward and barely deflected the punch.


Kraaaash!!


The huge stone pillar on the dock that the fist grazed exploded into fragments.


But its destructive power was not what truly sent a chill down my spine.


How the hell am I supposed to fight that?!


I could at least see Mihawk’s blue slashes and deflect them. But that... that was not a person, but a living mass of smoke.


How was I meant to cross blades with a fog ghost that could neither be grabbed nor cut? How was it any different from slashing at morning mist on an autumn day?


Whoosh!


"Do you think you can escape this sea by doing nothing but run?!"


Smoker emerged from the smoke again and mercilessly brought down the enormous iron bar drawn from his back toward the crown of my head.


There was no angle to dodge. He was a smoke monster I could not cut down, but if that heavy iron club hit me bare-bodied, my skull would split and my brains would spill out.


I have to block it!


For the sake of survival alone, I gritted my teeth and squeezed every drop of blood from my body, coating my entire cutlass densely in black Haki.


Shing—kraaaash!!


Jet-black energy swallowed the blade and surged into the air,


and Smoker’s pure-white smoke collided head-on with the black blade at the tip of my sword amid the rain.

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Ch. 14: Dead Man Pirates
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