Toshiro had told me to keep Matsumoto company when she drank, but we rarely ended up drinking together.
Matsumoto might normally be lazy, but she was someone who got things done when it truly mattered.
Lately, even she seemed so busy she barely had time to breathe.
She was so busy that instead of skipping work, she actually took official leave to come see me.
"You became a captain before me... A captaiiin! What kind of screwed-up chain of command is thiiis?"
"It couldn’t be helped. You’re still a long way from achieving Bankai, Matsumoto."
Besides, if this woman ever became a captain, her subordinates would be in serious trouble. She might even be worse than Shunsui Kyoraku.
Compared to her, I was a model officer.
"Honestly... Ever since he became captain, he glares daggers at me whenever I so much as pick him up!"
"Come on, let’s save the rest until we’re inside the tavern. I’ll listen to you complain as much as you want."
"Wait!!! Can we join you too?"
Isane and Kiyone appeared out of nowhere. For some reason, I felt as though I had been running into those sisters quite often lately.
"Kiyone, and Isane too? It’s been so long, you two! I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t even been able to attend the Shinigami Women’s Association meetings..."
Matsumoto bounded over and pulled Kiyone into a hug. A full head shorter than Matsumoto, Kiyone was buried in her breasts.
"Guh! I can’t... breathe!"
"But what brings you here, Isane? You never even drank because you thought it would make you taller."
"That’s... Phew! I’ll explain!"
"Huh?"
Having barely escaped from Matsumoto’s breasts, Kiyone dragged her away and disappeared. Apparently, there was some secret they needed to discuss.
"H-Hello, Ryunosuke."
Did she just bite her tongue?
"We’ve been seeing each other often lately, Isane."
Isane still seemed to have trouble dealing with men. Kiyone appeared to be dragging her around from place to place, but every time I saw her, she blushed and had no idea what to do with herself.
Because of that, I was also trying to treat her as carefully as possible.
"There’s no point standing around waiting. Why don’t the two of us go in first?"
"Th-The two of us... Yes..."
Honestly, I wanted to sit down as soon as possible. There was a considerable difference in our heights, so trying to meet her eyes made me feel as if my neck would snap, but lowering my head put two enormous hills directly in front of me, which was embarrassing for both of us.
With Isane following behind me, I entered the tavern and claimed a table for four. A server soon brought us the menu.
The establishment was famous throughout the Seireitei for its diverse and distinctive dishes. As a result, I sometimes ran into Soul Reapers I knew here.
This was also where my classmates from Shin’o Academy and I had gone for the second round of drinks last time.
"Come to think of it, this is where we first met, isn’t it?"
"...Yes!! Back then, um, I hope I wasn’t too much of a burden..."
"Of course not. The three of us men were just about to make the whole place gloomy, so you saved us."
The two who had gone off to share their little secret returned not long afterward.
Matsumoto’s expression seemed more relaxed than before, but the way she narrowed her eyes and grinned deviously did not bode well.
"Stop making that weird face and come sit down. We need to order."
"I’m fine with anything as long as it isn’t bamboo shoots. Kiyone eats just about anything too, so you and Isane can discuss it and decide."
Then again, Matsumoto was the sort of person who could happily drink without any food as long as someone put a bottle in her hand.
"You said you didn’t like fish cakes last time, right, Isane?"
"Yes! I eat everything else."
She seemed to have relaxed now that the other women had joined us. Isane wore a bright, carefree smile.
None of us were particularly picky eaters, so we ordered a reasonable selection of the tavern’s popular dishes.
Matsumoto spent so long agonizing over which alcohol to choose that our food began arriving one dish at a time before we could finally order our drinks.
"Well, it’s been so long since I last drank! I have to make the best possible choice!"
The mood quickly grew lively—or rather, everyone except me began getting drunk at astonishing speed.
One woman was downing drinks as if alcohol were her mortal enemy and she intended to wipe it from existence, another was unused to drinking, and the last had tried to keep pace with Matsumoto and was already teetering on the brink of her limit.
Before long, they had stopped conversing altogether and were each rambling about whatever they wanted.
"Where did that hairy gorilla bastard go? The little squirt looked up to him like a father...."
"Why... Why do people grow taller...? I want to be cute... like everyone else...."
"Captain Ukitake... I like you more... No, I respect you more, Captain."
Was this what they called loneliness in a crowd? It looked as though we would be wrapping things up sooner than expected.
Tap—clatter
At that moment, Matsumoto, who had been swinging her fist through the air while thinking about the missing Isshin, struck my cup and sent it rolling across the floor. Fortunately, it did not break, though it was now covered in dust.
"Come on... I’ll have to replace my cup now. Slow down a little, Matsumoto."
I was about to call for the server when Matsumoto stopped me.
"A cuuup? There’s a big one right here!"
Matsumoto used both hands to gather together the breasts of Isane, who was sitting beside her, shaping them into something resembling a cup.
"—!!"
"Huh?"
Isane had not grasped what was happening and merely made a cute noise through sleepy eyes.
"Look, Ryunosuke. Big women like Isane and me only have to gather them together like this, and—"
"Stop that, you old hag!"
What the hell was she doing to a drunk woman?!
Fortunately, Kiyone, who had been nodding off, chose that moment to awaken while shouting the name of her sworn rival.
"Sentaro—!!"
Kiyone was the type to get drunk quickly, but she also sobered up just as fast, so she was more or less clearheaded from that point onward.
The moment she came to her senses, she took in the astonishing spectacle before her, then looked at me with eyes that demanded an explanation.
"All right. Let’s call it a night and get everyone home."
Why are you looking at me...? I didn’t do anything.
"Come on, Matsumoto. Get on my back."
"Nooo. I’m going to make Kiyone carry me."
"Stop being unreasonable. You’re going in different directions, so how would that work?"
"...Ah! N-No, Ryunosuke! I should be the one to carry Matsumoto! You know, in terms of height and size! We can take a little detour! Ha ha ha...."
Was that... right?
Matsumoto was shorter than Isane, while I was taller than Kiyone, so it was not entirely wrong.
More importantly, the thought of persuading the belligerently drunk Matsumoto was horrifying, so we decided to take a slight detour.
When I carried Isane, who was much taller than me, the heavy softness enveloping the back of my neck rather than my back nearly made me lose consciousness. When I glanced over, Kiyone seemed to be in much the same situation.
Even on our way back, the thoroughly drunk Matsumoto insisted on making a nuisance of herself.
"Hey, Ryunosuke. You’d better find yourself a tall woman someday, huh?"
"Let’s just walk quietly."
"I’m talking about you. If you get together with a short woman, you’ll end up having a son like Toshiro, won’t you? Ohoho...."
I felt Isane twitch on my back.
Was it because Matsumoto had brought up height, her greatest insecurity? She seemed to react to it even while unconscious.
"Quiet. I’m still growing in the first place."
"Um, Matsumoto? Maybe you should stop talking about that..."
"Toshiro said the same thing, but he’s exactly the same height as last year!"
Kiyone seemed to mutter something in the middle of that, but Matsumoto’s voice was so loud that I could not hear her clearly.
Thank goodness we had switched. Otherwise, I would have dumped Matsumoto on the ground and left her behind by now.
"Anyway, what do you think about women taller than you? Is there some kind of limit?"
"I don’t know... Whether she’s ten centimeters taller than me or over two meters tall, I don’t think I’d particularly care. Half the women I know are taller than me to begin with.... As long as she isn’t too short, I don’t think it matters."
"That’s our Ryunosuke! You play coy, but give you a little poke and it all comes spilling out!"
I felt as though someone had said something similar to me before... Who had it been? The fact that I could not remember suggested that I was feeling the alcohol too.
"Why are you asking, anyway? Are you going to introduce me to someone?"
"Nooo. The best encounters happen naturally! Expect nothing!"
Then what the hell was I supposed to do?
Fortunately, Matsumoto quietly fell asleep on Kiyone’s back after that.
Kiyone merely heaved one sigh after another without saying anything, while Isane’s soft breathing played beneath it all like music.
When we reached the nearer Tenth Division barracks, Kiyone promptly dumped Matsumoto in the women’s lounge and took Isane onto her own back.
Then she told me we should meet again sometime and disappeared.
...If she was going to do that, why did she suggest switching in the first place?
The next day, I heard that Matsumoto had gone to see Isane and begged profusely for forgiveness, apparently worried that she might have done something wrong.
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