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Bleach: I Can't Get an Amen
Chapter 1 - Azuma Shohei
Through five years of sleepless nights, what I swung
was not steel, but my own weak heart.
Hiding cheeks flushed red by the rain,
at the end of the path I ran to escape the shadows of cowardice,
the thing that brought me to a halt
was neither the teachings of a saint nor great honor.
When I realized the blood flowing from my wounds
resembled the screams of yesterday,
only then
did I pull myself up from the mud.
To tread upon the earth with broken knees—
that is the singular act of defiance and justice
I spit out toward the world.
1st Division Barracks
"...The documents should have arrived by now. This is a bit of a problem..."
A man wearing a straw hat with a thick growth of beard—Captain Commander Shunsui Kyoraku—let out a sigh followed by a soft chuckle that echoed through the 1st Division barracks.
Standing on either side of Shunsui were a black-haired woman with glasses, 1st Division Lieutenant Nanao Ise, and a white-haired man, the other 1st Division Lieutenant, Genshiro Okikiba.
Arrayed elsewhere were the other captains in their proper order: the blonde 3rd Division Captain Rojuro Ootoribashi, the white-haired 4th Division Captain Isane Kotetsu, the blonde 5th Division Captain Shinji Hirako with his bob cut, the long-haired 6th Division Captain Byakuya Kuchiki, the buzz-cut 7th Division Captain Tetsuzaemon Iba, the 8th Division Captain Lisa Yadomaru who shared a resemblance to Nanao, the 9th Division Captain Kensei Muguruma with his white delinquent-style hair, the young white-haired 10th Division Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya, the bizarre 11th Division Captain Kenpachi Zaraki, the 12th Division Captain Mayuri Kurotsuchi wearing his mask, the petite black-haired 13th Division Captain Rukia Kuchiki, and finally, the black-haired 2nd Division Captain and Commander-in-Chief of the Stealth Force, Soi Fon.
"...Good grief. Is it really okay for the paperwork to be this late?"
Iba adjusted his slightly slipping sunglasses, speaking in a tone that was half-joking and half-serious.
At his words, Shunsui nodded and looked toward the 2nd Division Captain, Soi Fon.
"Has nothing arrived yet?"
"...Nothing... has arrived yet."
Soi Fon replied to Shunsui's question with a hint of rising emotion in her voice.
It certainly wasn't a positive emotion.
But at that moment, the doors to the 1st Division barracks slammed open.
"Ho..."
Shunsui looked quite surprised and intrigued by the figure who appeared at the door.
The newcomer was a young man with black hair and brown eyes, wearing a shihakusho marked with the number 15 below a 2.
A device resembling earphones was tucked into his pocket, connected to something unseen.
Beads of sweat clung to his forehead, and as he panted for breath, moisture trailed from his eyes.
It was impossible to tell if they were tears or not.
"...15th Seat!"
As soon as the man entered, Soi Fon turned her gaze toward him and immediately shouted.
As expected, she didn't seem to be in a good mood.
"I... I'm so sorry..."
The man bowed his head deeply.
Droplets of sweat dripped onto the floor.
5th Division Captain Shinji Hirako looked toward where the man stood.
"Who's this? It's not Marechiyo Omaeda. Never seen this kid before..."
"Ah, ah... I'm the 2nd Division 15th Seat..."
"Stop the chatter and bring those here right now!"
The moment the 15th Seat officer tried to introduce himself, Soi Fon shouted again, glancing between him and Shinji.
The man's shoulders flinched in surprise.
"Ah, yes, ma'am..."
The man walked slowly toward her, clutching the documents.
As he approached Soi Fon, his heartbeat began to accelerate audibly.
His face flushed red, and his black hair seemed to droop even further.
Seeing this, several captains let out small smiles, perhaps thinking of something else entirely.
"Get going."
"Yes..."
At Soi Fon's command, the man bowed his head, his face crimson. Unable to say another word, he turned and practically fled from the 1st Division barracks.
It was clearly raining outside...
But strangely, his face didn't seem to care.
He walked alone through the rainy streets, his mind a blur.
His face felt too hot for him to think clearly.
He only snapped back to his senses when he spotted the sign marked with the kanji for '2'.
"...Surely... surely..."
Standing before the entrance of the 2nd Division, he began to think about those documents.
The files had definitely been in the location he remembered.
He was certain they were there yesterday, even before he went home after training.
'Did someone move them on purpose?' he wondered.
"Azuma, what are you thinking about out here?"
A man behind him gave the stationary Azuma a light tap.
It was a man wearing a shihakusho marked with a 9 below the 2.
"Ah... Ah, 9th Seat."
"Call me Riku when it's just the two of us."
"...Well... about that..."
"Sorry, everyone from the Lieutenant down to the 14th Seat was out on a mission... Did you deliver the documents okay?"
"...No. I mean, I delivered them, but..."
"..."
Riku's expression shifted slightly.
The corners of his mouth seemed to turn down just a fraction.
"...Right, things happen. As long as they were delivered, it's fine. I'm heading out."
"Ah, yes..."
Riku turned and disappeared into the alleyway between the 2nd and 3rd Divisions.
The man named Azuma turned and entered the 2nd Division barracks.
Inside, Soul Reapers wearing shihakusho with various numbers were training with their swords despite the rain.
Some were practicing swings, while others were simply running.
The common thread was that they all wore the mark of the 2nd Division.
Azuma didn't have enough time to just stand around watching them.
He turned his head and began walking toward the western corridor of the barracks.
Members with various ranks were moving about the western corridor as well.
As he walked, he came across a fountain.
For some reason, Azuma found himself drawn to it.
"..."
He was staring at the fountain when it happened.
"Hey! 15th Seat!"
Three male Soul Reapers suddenly appeared and shoved Azuma from behind.
Startled, Azuma fell flat on the ground with a thud.
"Waaah!! Oof..."
"Looking good, Azuma?"
The man in the center spoke with a smirk.
His shihakusho was marked with a small 10.
The men standing on either side of him were marked with 11 and 12.
"We saw you training until late at night... Were you working that hard just because we were all out on missions? Huh?"
"Pfft... That... 10th Seat Tetsuo..."
Azuma spat out a bit of dirt that had gotten into his mouth and looked up at them.
"Now, now... don't look so surprised. You'll make us look like the bad guys."
"..."
"It's just, you know... we know how hard our Azuma works. It wasn't just last night, was it? It was the night before that, and a week ago... even a year ago when I was the 15th Seat. Is your dream to go home at the same time as the Captain? Hmm?"
"N-no, that's..."
"So, since Azuma's life seems so tough..."
"Yes?"
"...We thought we'd play a little game to liven things up. You understand?"
"..."
Azuma's eyes widened as he looked at them, but he soon lowered his head slightly.
"...Tch, no fun. Let's go."
"Yes, sir! Man, how did a guy like that become the 15th Seat in just five years... How much did he have to suck up to the Captain?"
With those complaining remarks, the 10th, 11th, and 12th Seats moved off toward the training grounds.
Once they were gone, Azuma looked up at the sky and watched the falling rain.
He pulled out his earphones to listen to the sound of a music box.
"...Azuma!"
But a sudden, loud voice startled him, causing him to drop his earphones.
"Gah!"
He looked back to see a massive man glaring down at him.
It was the 2nd Division Lieutenant, Marechiyo Omaeda. He had heard the news about the documents and had come running, still panting for breath.
"Follow me, you brat..."
He grabbed Azuma's arm and dragged him toward the 2nd Division Lieutenant's office.
The office was quite spacious and even had a sofa. One might think he was just a very wealthy man... and while he was, he was also the Lieutenant who had used his personal funds to upgrade the 2nd Division's facilities to the latest standards.
The earphones Azuma currently owned were also a gift from the Lieutenant to celebrate him reaching the 15th Seat after five years in the service.
However, even Omaeda had his doubts about Azuma.
Reaching the 15th Seat in five years wasn't unprecedented, but it was a fast pace. It would be one thing if he had graduated early from the Shin'o Academy, but he was a Soul Reaper who had graduated with average skills. He wasn't particularly close to the other Soul Reapers either. As for his background, it was only known that he was from the Rukongai...
Because of his commoner origins and rapid promotion, he wasn't viewed favorably by several members of the 2nd Division, which tended to have many members of noble birth.
However, Omaeda firmly believed that the Captain must have had a reason for promoting him to the 15th Seat.
"...The documents. What happened?"
"Well... it's because I was too slow in finding them..."
Azuma was that kind of man.
He wasn't the type to shift the blame onto others. He knew he wasn't in a position to judge anyone else.
"Sigh..."
Of course, Omaeda knew this about Azuma's personality.
Even so, he asked, hoping for an honest answer.
Both he and Captain Soi Fon knew that the 10th, 11th, and 12th Seats were bullying Azuma, but because of Azuma's own attitude, they couldn't properly issue punishments.
It was also questionable whether Soi Fon even cared about such situations in the first place...
"Azuma, you really are..."
Omaeda sighed again.
"...Fine. I'll handle the explanation to the Captain regarding the documents. A Hollow incident just came in."
"A Hollow... sir?"
"Yeah. The 12th Division guys notified us that a Hollow was detected. It looks like they need our help."
Omaeda handed a document to Azuma.
It contained details about the Hollow. An unidentified Hollow, information gathering required. Extermination permitted if possible... Located in Rukongai District 60... Various pieces of information and mission objectives were listed.
"I'm sorry to give you this right after the document mess... but everyone from me down to the 14th Seat has to write reports on our previous missions. But since this is an unidentified Hollow... we need to send the highest-ranking person available... I'm sorry for sending you alone. Just hold out for a bit, and the 12th Division guys will show up."
"...Understood."
Just as Azuma gave a brief bow to Omaeda and prepared to leave the office—
"Azuma."
At Omaeda's call, Azuma looked back.
"...You have to find the foundation of your own path as a Soul Reaper. I can help pull you along after that, but..."
"...Yes..."
Azuma didn't quite understand the meaning, but he nodded at Omaeda's words and bowed once more.
He turned, walked out, and began his journey.
---
"..."
Rukongai District 60 wasn't that far.
Fortunately, the area where the Hollow's spiritual pressure was being measured wasn't in the center of the district, but on the outskirts, in a forested area.
'But a forest is even more dangerous alone...' the thought flickered through Azuma's mind.
However, since it was a mission, he endured his slight fear and continued on his way.
It was while he was traveling through the woods.
"Kwahhh!!!"
Spiritual pressure suddenly surged.
'It should have revealed itself gradually...!' Flustered by the suddenness, Azuma saw a Hollow leap out from his left.
The Hollow drove something like a sword into his side.
The sword embedded in Azuma's side soon turned into a shadow and vanished.
But the damage to Azuma was very real.
"Urgh... Ugh..."
Blood began to pour from Azuma's side.
He clutched the wound.
The thought that he might die here began to surface.
And then, a memory he didn't want to recall forced its way into his mind.
In that moment, Azuma panicked and began to back away slowly.
"No... No, I don't want to die here... If I die... surely..."
A slight sobbing sound escaped him.
Thoughts other than the Hollow began to fill Azuma's head.
The Hollow even began to look like someone else.
He started to run.
He turned and fled. He had to at least report the information. 'That Hollow has the ability to transform into people...' Azuma thought.
He had never felt this way during other missions in the past.
During those missions, he hadn't seen their faces.
He believed he had been able to reach the 15th Seat in five years because he had been able to forget that.
But Azuma should have realized that the ability wasn't the Hollow's.
He ran through the forest like a madman.
Those 'beings' began to come to mind.
They haunted his thoughts strangely.
"Gah!"
As he sprinted through the woods, his foot caught on a rock.
His momentum carried him forward, and his body began to tumble down a slope.
"...!!"
After his body stopped rolling, he regained his senses and opened his eyes. The first thing he saw was a stone wall.
He was right in front of a village.
A village meant people lived there.
"...The village..."
In that moment, Azuma thought about what he was doing.
He thought about himself, just running away. But at the same time, other images came to mind.
He thought of himself swinging his sword countless times throughout the night.
He remembered a passage from a book from the World of the Living about putting in more effort than others.
And he remembered the words Captain Shunsui said to all new Soul Reapers about protecting the lives of the citizens...
...Though he doubted if that was ever truly upheld...
A different kind of will began to sprout within him.
He felt that perhaps being punished by 'them' would be better than this.
"...Huff... Huff..."
Azuma forced strength into his trembling legs and stood up.
Once he succeeded in standing, he drew his sword from its sheath. It was a blade that looked different from a standard-issue Zanpakuto.
He stared toward the forest.
As if responding to his challenge, the Hollow emerged from the woods and glared at him.
The Hollow seemed slightly surprised by his reaction.
As the Hollow appeared, Azuma opened his mouth slightly.
"Voi..."
But whether it was the strain on his leg muscles or the significant blood loss from his side, his strength failed him, and he couldn't finish what he wanted to say.
Seizing the moment, the Hollow let out a roar and lunged at Azuma.
It was at that very moment.
"Crush them, Gegetsuburi!"
A spiked iron ball flew from nowhere and struck the Hollow's head with massive force.
A faint shadow began to leak out of the Hollow.
Then, a massive man landed and stood before Azuma.
It was Omaeda.
"Lieu... Lieutenant..."
"You idiot!! Consider yourself lucky I happened to be passing by!"
"..."
Azuma couldn't say a word.
"Still, you did well. Whether it was conscious or unconscious, the information on that Hollow was successfully transmitted. The 12th Division guys will be here soon, along with the 4th Division..."
"...Lieutenant..."
He couldn't speak because of the guilt of having run away.
"I... I mean..."
"...You sent the data. You didn't just run away... and... most importantly, you succeeded in standing up at the critical moment. If you had stayed down, this Hollow would have gone straight for the village."
"..."
"...I'll take responsibility from here, so just rest."
Azuma looked at Omaeda.
A few tears began to fall.
"Lieu... Lieutenant..."
"Azuma, standing up at the most important moment... let that be the foundation of your justice as a Soul Reaper."
"..."
Azuma gave a small nod.
After hearing those words, Azuma's strength left him completely, and he lost consciousness.
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