When I finally came to my senses, I found myself back in the body of a young child. I was back in that horrific coal mine.
—You killed us.
At the sound of that skin-crawling, raspy voice, I looked behind me. A man wearing an Ursus military uniform stood there, a bottle of liquor in one hand. He was limping, and a massive hole in his neck was sluggishly leaking blood.
—You killed us.
Led by Zoban, a crowd of Ursus soldiers emerged. None of them were whole. One had a hole through his chest, another was missing a head, and some were hacked to pieces...
—You are a monster.
This time, voices came from the opposite direction. Compared to the Ursus soldiers, these voices sounded normal. When I turned my head toward them, I saw a line of people whose bellies had been sliced open, their organs dangling precariously.
—You played with human corpses? You’re trash.
I simply laughed as I looked at them. It had been a long time since I’d had this dream.
"Shut up, you bastards."
At first, this nightmare had put me through hell, but now it didn't stir much in me. No, that wasn't quite right—I was forcibly suppressing the feeling.
"Yeah, I know. I’m crazy. But in this insane world, is there anyone who isn't? Especially you lot—is there a single one among you Ursus soldiers who has the right to say a damn thing to me?"
By focusing on the flaws of my enemies, I lowered the universal standards of bioethics I held myself to. By doing so, I reclaimed the justification for my own twisted actions. Next, I turned my gaze to the corpses whose bodies had been carved up for biological experiments.
"Your deaths are truly tragic. But remember this: your remains treated the person I cherish most, and they will ensure that other Infected like you don't have to die. Though your bellies are split open, you are greater than any named hero. Rest in peace."
I granted myself a noble sense of purpose. I constructed an ideal that both those corpses and I could accept, proving that my actions were right. Recalling the light in my heart—Yelena’s face—was a massive help in brainwashing myself.
Once more, I turned back to the Ursus soldiers.
"...If you're dead, stay dead. I’m alive, and you can’t touch me. To adapt to a world gone mad, to protect the people I care about, I have to be even crazier than the world itself. You're dead because you couldn't do that."
At my declaration, the phantoms began to vanish one by one. ...What a goddamn nightmare.
-----------
"Gah!"
When I opened my eyes, a familiar ceiling came into view. It was the ceiling of the tent I shared with Yelena.
"Ah! Earth, are you awake?"
"Yelena?"
Yelena was by my side, nursing me. Besides her, the Medical Squad Leader, who had helped carry me earlier, was also in the camp.
"How long was I out?"
"You were down for a full day."
Damn it. I wasted a whole day? This is no time to be sleeping.
"The cause of your collapse was simple accumulated fatigue. However, you must rest for the time being. It’s a relief it wasn’t a major illness, but if you keep working like that, something serious will definitely happen."
I shook my head at the Medical Squad Leader's words.
"You know better than anyone that this isn't the time to rest, don't you? There's still a mountain of problems to solve..."
"Stop. Why are you trying to overdo it again? You literally collapsed! Please, just get some rest!"
"She is right. The Captain has granted the Staff Officer a vacation. There will be no right of refusal. It was decided at the meeting that the officers, led by Lady Yelena, will take turns monitoring you for the next two weeks."
Wait, instead of encouraging a man who wants to work, they're going to monitor me to make sure I don't work?
"This is tyranny! I couldn't work for a whole day; I can't delay things any further. I'm perfectly fine... Ugh!"
"You fall over just from a little push like that, and you're talking about work? Behave yourself!"
Yelena’s gloved hand pressed against my chest, and without the strength to resist, I tumbled back onto the bed.
Ah... It was a crude bed made of straw, but I could swear that in this moment, it felt cozier and more comfortable than any mattress. The bed hugged me tight like a trap and wouldn't let go.
"Looking at your face, it seems you finally feel like resting."
"No. I can work perfectly well while lying down."
I said the bed was comfortable. I didn't say I was quitting work. At my answer, the Medical Squad Leader and Yelena looked at me as if they were fed up.
"Keep dreaming. We’ll be watching you every single minute. Now that the patient is awake, I’ll take my leave."
Once the Medical Squad Leader left, only Yelena and I remained in the tent. An awkward silence hung in the air for a moment.
"Yelena. Could you please get the documents regarding Originium Slug breeding from the drawer of my desk in the Staff Department camp..."
With a sharp thwack, sparks practically flew from my forehead. Yelena had given me a flick.
"Ouch!"
"This is the only thing you get instead of work when you say useless things."
That flick was surprisingly painful. Had she been training for revenge based on her own experiences of being hit? My body, which had been trying to sit up, was forced back down by violence once again.
"Oh? You're wearing gloves?"
"Huh? Oh, u-uh, yeah! You told me before that hands are the part of the body with the most bacteria. So I had no choice but to wear them to nurse you."
Good grief, how precious. I couldn't stop a smile from leaking out.
"Fine. I give up. I'll rest properly for two weeks."
"You're late in resigning yourself to it."
Looking back, I had never truly rested once until now. If I had reached the point of collapsing, perhaps taking some time to recharge as she suggested wasn't such a bad idea.
"How did the meeting go?"
"Talulah has officially joined us. She'll be bringing the Infected from the southern tundra here soon."
In the end, I couldn't stop it.
It couldn't be helped. My attempt to block her joining in the meeting failed for the ridiculous reason of overwork. The taste of defeat brought on by my own failure to manage my condition was quite bitter.
Since it turned out like this, I had no choice but to move to Plan B. In the original story, Talulah’s body was stolen by the Arts and schemes of a wicked man named Duke Kashchey.
There were many causes, but the biggest was likely the death of her confidante and friend, Alina.
Confronted with the reality of Alina's death, she ended up abandoning the sense of justice and conviction she held, which led to the fires of war sparked by his schemes—fires that claimed the lives of my father, Yelena, and countless Reunion Infected.
Since I failed to prevent Talulah from joining, I had to ensure she never fell into corruption.
"I'll have to wait until Talulah brings the Infected, then."
I couldn't leave this tent anyway. The Guerrilla officers, including Yelena and even my father, were taking turns watching me to make sure I was resting properly.
I would likely face Talulah again in two weeks. Until then, I decided to push thoughts of work aside and relax.
----------
Nothing in this world ever went according to plan.
Not the fact that Yelena and I still shared a tent at this age, nor the fact that I failed to stop Talulah because I collapsed from exhaustion, and...
"Hello?"
Nor the fact that this woman had come to monitor me.
The white-haired Draco sat down beside me and began peeling an apple—something incredibly hard to come by in the tundra.
"Did you join today?"
"Two days ago, to be precise. I’ve simply come to monitor you as a member of the leadership."
Exactly one week had passed since I started my rest, which meant she had arrived here with her group only five days after the meeting ended.
"That was remarkably fast."
"I’m not the kind of fool who lets an opportunity slip away."
"Bring me the roster. I need to check if there are any suspicious individuals among the people you brought."
"Trying to work again? No. My orders today are to watch whether you work or not. And I’ve left that task to the Staff Department, so don't worry."
Talulah sliced the peeled apple into bite-sized pieces and popped one into my mouth before I could respond.
"This is a bribe, so please look kindly upon me. Staff Officer?"
It was sweet. It had been a long time since I’d tasted fresh fruit in the first place. It was a hundred times better than the fishy, tough meat of an Originium Slug.
"Thanks. To be honest, it’s been so long since I’ve had fruit that I haven't even tasted a tundra berry in ages."
"That’s a bit surprising. With a rank like Staff Officer, couldn't you afford a few luxuries when it comes to food?"
"Everyone in the Guerrilla is in the same boat. It would be absurd for me to enjoy delicacies alone."
At my words, she flashed a faint smile.
"You really do treasure the Guerrilla, don't you?"
"I do. And you are a member of the Guerrilla now as well."
"My, what an honor. I recall you being the one who opposed my joining more than anyone else."
"Your sarcasm is top-tier. You won in that meeting, and I lost. You proved the necessity and safety of your joining, while I failed to press the attack further. Even if it was due to a failure in managing my condition, it was my complete defeat."
"Is that how you think of it?"
Talulah stopped slicing the apple and rested her chin on her hand as if lost in thought. Soon, a mischievous smile played on her lips as if she’d had a good idea.
"The math doesn't quite add up, though. You hail me as the winner, but my side was stripped of operational command."
"..."
It was absurd, but I was curious to see where she was going with this, so I responded with silence.
"At this rate, it’s nothing but a pyrrhic victory. I feel so wronged I might not even be able to sleep tonight."
"Sigh..."
She was truly cunning. Having learned social graces and politics under Duke Kashchey, Talulah’s silver tongue was nothing short of a textbook example of nobility.
To speak so circuitously even when she wanted something... She was a completely different type of person from Yelena, who possessed a pure charm. I inwardly wondered if blue blood flowed through her veins instead of red.
"Tell me what you want. If it’s within my power, I’ll judge the extent of it and grant it appropriately."
"What’s that? Why the conditions? I feel like you should grant it unconditionally for the math to work out."
"Hey."
I could see right through her. It was a classic negotiation tactic—proposing an unreasonable demand first to secure a more advantageous position.
"...No, fine. Have it your way."
"Huh?"
"Is there anything the Staff Officer’s authority can't handle? If there's something you want to do, say it. I'll grant it."
I no longer had any intention of persecuting her, as we were now essentially in the same boat. I just had to make sure she didn't fall into corruption.
"Furthermore, you may take back the operational command we discussed in the meeting. You'll be better at commanding the Infected from the southern tundra, and you'll be able to control them."
"Can I ask just one question?"
"Since when did you ask for permission? Do as you like. As you said, I'm the loser."
"...That sarcastic way of speaking, and the way you gracefully accept defeat. Are you, by any chance, from a noble family?"
"...?"
Seriously, why is she trying to paint me as one of those blue-bloods?
"If you're going to talk nonsense, just go and bring the roster."
Of course, my request was flatly ignored.
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